Beloved

Zephaniah 3:17 The Lord your God is with you , He is mighty to save, He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.


A few years ago I was sitting in Suzanne's house starting a new Bible study. I can't remember which one(I didn't get to finish it because of scheduling conflicts with Troy's job and the kids.) What I do remember is we were asked to read several Bible verses and pick the one that meant the most to me. I read this verse and honestly was ready to head home right then. I had never read that verse that I could remember. I remember being absolutely floored that the Lord of the universe took great delight in me. That he rejoices over me with singing. Wow. I have been on a long journey of seeing who I am in Him. I have found a new identity. An identity that is not founded in my accomplishments or achievements but one that has nothing whatsoever to do with me and everything to do with who God is. I had fallen into a miserable trap of finding my value in what I did. I have done it my whole life. I was always striving to be the best at sports and academics and I was good. I succeeded and had medals, scholarships and certificates to prove it. I was good at my job and well liked. When I got married we had a great relationship. I cooked and cleaned and supported my husband and loved it. Then our kids started coming and I prided myself of being able to "have it all together". I was the master of schedules, organization and meal planning. But with each one I became more frustrated with myself. I was overwhelmed and felt like I was swimming upstream. By the time Sophie was a year old I felt like a complete loser. My house was a wreck, my kids watched way too much TV, I still had "baby" weight to lose and I was a basic mess. I convinced my self that I was a failure. I had no worth or value to anyone. It was a very hard place. Then I read those words "the Lord delights in me and He sings over me." Those words brought a small bit of light to a dark place in my heart. I wasn't fixed overnight but God has been using those words to change my view of myself. It has taken almost 2 1/2 years to actually believe them. But I do. My house is very often still a mess, my kids still misbehave, I still have some baby weight to lose, I am often overwhelmed but the darkness has lifted. Because no matter what I am a child of the King. I am His beloved. He takes great delight in me and rejoices over me with singing.

Not me Monday

It's that time again. I really only have a few since we have spent most of the last week with the stomach flu.

I did not let Ethan come downstairs and watch olympics with me until after midnight after everyone else was asleep. He really was having a bad dream and needed some extra snuggle time.(or that's what I told myself)

I did not throw the school books out the window and threw the bikes in the van on the one warm day last week and took the boys on a bike ride.

I did not not believe Sophie on Friday morning when she said she was going to throw up because she had been well for over 24 hours and think she was playing the sympathy card to get to watch Curious George.

I did not find out a few minutes later, while I was using the bathroom, that she indeed was telling the truth as she said "Get up mommy quick I am going to throw..."

I did not jump up with my pants around my ankles to tend to her and have to boys walk in a say "Momma we see your big hiney".

Well, Hope you are having a good Monday

Five question Friday

Five Question Friday!!!!

1. Do you sing karaoke? Yes, Yes, Yes. I love it and used to have a karaoke machine. We have lots of 80's music
2. What is your favorite coffee drink? I don't like coffee but I love chai tea
3. If you could choose your own name, what would it be? I actually love my name and always have.
4. Were you ever bullied? No, my friends said I was way to Julia Sugarbaker"from designing women" for that.
5. How often do you eat fast food? Probably once or twice a week. Too much in my opinion.

Little thoughts

I have had a whirlwind of activity the last few weeks. I have been busy and waiting for things to slow down. I have been falling into bed exhausted and sleeping through my alarm. There have been some good things. While my husband was a way for work friends, family and I redid our bedroom for Valentine's day. We finally have a "love nest". He loves it.
The boys and I were able to take a long bike ride and enjoy some warmer weather. Great quality time. The family took a hike on Saturday.

But there have been some hard times. We have been dealing with a situaion that was really hard. We have been on this roller coaster ride. We would see the end and then it really wasn't over. We have had close friends praying and hoping for this situation to be over. But here we are a week later and we are still there. God didn't answer our prayers the way we had hoped but He is still God and He is still good. I have felt His peace and comfort. I have seen Him take a situation that could have caused division in my marriage and I have seen Him make us like-minded. I have seen His protection. He has put people of wisdom in our path to confirm things. The situation has not changed but i have. I am not worried or consumed by it. I am believing that God will answer our prayers, it may be next week, next month or next year but I am trusting. Because He is God, He is still on His throne and that is a very comforting thought.

1. Have you ever hit an animal with your vehicle? Yes, I hit a big dog one night after leaving my boyfriend's house(yes it is now my husband). I was so upset that I turned around and went back to his house for some sympathy.
2. When you see a string on your clothes do you pull it off or cut if off? pull, I don't have time for things like scissors(incidently, I pick nails too.)
3. Did you have your own room or share a room when you were young?both, my brother and I are 15 months apart we shared a room until I was about 8
4. Would you rather wear the same thing for the rest of your life or eat the same thing for the rest of your life? Wear, Love any lounge clothes
5. What was your favorite TV show as a child? Anything on TGIF, star search and fame.

So, it's your turn. Jump on to Five Question Friday. I just love it!!!!!!

bedtime with Sophie

Goes something like this.
Sophie: Mommy, "I don't want to sleep in my room. I am scared."

Me: "It's okay Sophie I am going to get my jammies on and come snuggle you and rub your back. Go get in bed."

Sophie goes to her room. 30 seconds later

Sophie: "I don't want to sleep with you I want to sleep with the boys."
Translation: I want to go play and talk with the boys.

Me: "Remember tomorrow is Sunday, we have church, we can't do a sleepover in the boys floor tonight. I will be right there. Get in the bed."

Sophie goes to her room. 1 minute later.

Sophie: " Mommy, I want to sleep in the boys room. If you say no I will be very angry. If you say yes I will not be very angry."

Me as I try not to laugh: "Sophie it is okay to be angry but my answer is no.

Sophie goes to the boys room.

Sophie: "Mommy, I asked Ethan if I can sleep in his floor and he said it was okay. So, I will get my pillow. Okay."

Me: " Sophie, no means no. Get in the bed and do not get out."

As we speak she is dramatically crying.

She is persistent.

Five question Friday

I know it's not Friday but I like this so I am going to do it a day late.

1. What is the one thing your love does for you that you can't live without?Prays for me and is the spiritual leader of our home


2. When did you know your love was "the one"? The day after our first date he called me and we talked for hours. He really shared his heart with me and I fell in love.

3. Does your love have a special ringtone on your cell? no, not many people call my cell anyway.


4. What are you attracted to most in your special someone? Heart and height


5. Did you know when/where he/she was going to pop the big question? no, total surprise.